Just a Fun Filled Weekend with my BESTIE!

GAHHH!!!! Guess who drove for forever to come see me?!?! One of my bestest friends in the whole wide world! 

We are able to see each other maybe one a year, and that might be a stretch too. But for her family vacation this past June, (remember when I posted in real time! Hahaha!) she brought her two girls and boyfriend out to see me (and the ocean!) - of course we celebrated with daiquiris!

The whole weekend they were here, I was quite frustrated with Perry's work schedule. Because he was down an important team member, he was having to work a late shift and close the store. Typically he'd get home around midnight? That's actually a guess. I was always in bed way before then. I was annoyed about this schedule of his because he'd miss their first evening at our house, but I grumbled and groaned about it and then let it be. Then my store got involved. My store was hosting a large event, and because my manager wasn't able to attend and run it, Perry volunteer his time so he could have Friday night off. Get this - he traded that night for work (including commute time) from 2pm Saturday to 2pm Sunday with NO SLEEP. Needless to say, he didn't really get the opportunity both Britta and I was hoping for to really get to know them. Oh hum.  

 We did still manage to enjoy our time together Saturday morning though! We took three vehicles up Mount Saint Helens and stopped at the Ape Cave for a morning of hiking.

 Aren't we so cute? While these caves were similar to the Lewis and Clark Cavern in Montana, they were different in that it wasn't a guided tour and it wasn't lit. Wearing headlamps just added to the adventure!

 There is an upper cave that involves a lot of climbing, and a lower cave (which we did) that is mostly just walking, but walking carefully. With Ms. Gail, and Britta's youngest girl being so little, we opted for the easier route.

 I didn't know what to expect when we went down the steps into the great beyond. Honestly, I was a little nervous. (This is fine....this is fine!)

 The kids all seemed to enjoy themselves. The adults were constantly telling them to slow down. And if there was a rock to climb on, they climbed the crud out it.

 At the very end of the tunnel, the ceiling gets super low to where you need to bear crawl to get past one point. I went in as far as I could with a backpack on, and then Jason went the rest of the way to get the kids. (Sorry for the butt shot!) It was a little too small of a space for me.

 They are all just so cute!! I highly recommend this little adventure to everyone! Just know that park (especially with three vehicles) is a bitch.

 #bff

 We timed our hike out of the cave perfectly because when we arrived back to the parking lot, we had the chance to meet Smokey the Bear!! So cool!

Perry headed off to work after the caves but the rest of us took a hike to see a scenic view of Mount St. Helens. I thought the view would be a *little* better than this... 

 This view however, was breath-taking! After waiting around to hear back from Perry as to when he'd be done at the event, we ended up just leaving him behind and headed west for the ocean. We ended up at Fort Stevens State Park. Our family had been there before, but not to this part of the beach. I think there were maybe 10 other people there. It was empty and perfect!

 This was Britta and the girls' first time seeing the Pacific Ocean and I had so much fun photographing them! I literally said, "Put your phone down and go enjoy this!" I hardly have any pictures with my kids, so I try to make it a point to take pictures of other moms with their kiddies.

 I had water to my ankles and I was freezing. I don't know how they were doing this!

 After a family had left, our kids took over this hut and never touched the ocean for the rest of the afternoon. I might have dozed off for a minute trying to stay warm under a towel. I thought I was prepared this time for the breeze, but I wasn't.

Who doesn't love a good smooch on the beach?!

 By the end of the day, this sweet little thing wasn't feeling so hot. She quite the snuggler though!

I'm so so so happy they made the decision to come out to visit me! We had such a fun time together! Did I mention I got her hooked on playing Ticket to Ride? I think we might have played 6 games in one sitting. We put it away at 4am. I might have thrown my cards at Jason once, but I think he deserved it! I can't wait to see them again, and their NEW house!!

A Few Memories from June

I’ve been a little behind in the blogging world, but there were a few photos I want to share (out of order 🙄) that I would like to be able to look back on and go, “ahhhh!!! They were so little!” So without delay, here are the bambino’s graduation pictures from June.

Seriously, they are adorable. Never mind the fact that I did again bribe the boys with candy to look decent. Please also note, HD was cranky as &!*% and the only way I could get him to smile was by saying, “Please don’t make me say poop to you.” Or just simply “oh diarrhea.” Then he would start giggling and moving, which then made the picture blurry. 🙄 But JP and Ms. Gail! 😍😍

 Also in June, Grandma came to visit when our trip to Spokane was canceled. We spent the afternoon checking out a park in the area that we hadn’t been to before. It did not disappoint and wasn’t too far from our home!

HD had his first post-diagnosis doctor appointment in June as well. SPD got the best of us that morning. I felt like dying. He was bouncing around the room like a frog all the while making monkey noises. I think one of my eye daggers hit him because he did simmer down for a hot minute but then he moved on to making himself burp. The doctor thought it was funny. I did not. However, on a more positive note, his A1C was down to 7.5. His A1C is an average of his blood sugar measurements for the last three months. In the hospital two months prior, it was off their measurable chart of 14.5, which correlated to roughly an average blood sugar of above 400. A 7.5 is roughly a blood sugar average of about 150, and that number still had one month of undiagnosed, super high blood sugar factored into it. His doctor wants his A1C between 6.5-7.5, I believe, so it appears we're managing well, for now.

On another note, I came home to this mess one day. I walked in and my jaw dropped. I don't know if they were looking for something in the burn drawer, but we had paper everywhere. Before I could even say a word, HD showed me the video he took of his eagle. Story has it that when all the scrap paper was out of the drawer, he thought it would be fun to make a snow angel, but instead of it making an angel, it actually made an eagle. He was over the moon about this.

I often feel like I'm winning when my kids get excited to go to the library. We hadn't been to this one before, but they instinctively knew where the tablets were. Imagine my surprise when it was time to go, and Ms. Gail was *so* upset there wasn't time for her to look at books. I wonder why?

One of the final projects of the year for second graders is learning about their community. In this project they created their own business to put on Main Street. JP made a store called Jim's Electronics. The whole thing was adorable, especially because he hire me to work there, but this page cracked me up. "The very best thing about my community is griffitti." I just love the BFF's and the skull and crossbones for his picture of graffiti!

On one of Ms. Gail's last days of school, I accompanied her and her class to the zoo for the morning. We had so much fun hanging out with her friends and their moms. We did get separated for a little bit, but it gave her and I the opportunity to spend some time together. during which she touched a snake! Right next to the snake exhibit was the cat house. Of all the animals she could admire at the zoo, she was stuck on watching the orange tabby cat sleep on a cushion. Go figure!

I also accompanied HD and his class to the Rice Rock Museum in Hillsboro, OR. Funny thing. I took that Friday off of work to go on the field trip because EVERYTHING sent home said Friday. I show up Friday, and his teacher looks at me and says, "Uh, what can I help you with?" I'm here for the field trip...? "Oh...that's on Tuesday" I was livid. I was scheduled to work Tuesday and had to find someone to cover for me, otherwise HD couldn't go on his trip, because the nurse wasn't available to go. Don't even get me started on how frustrating that was. On our lunch break at the museum, his friends witnessed him giving himself a dose of insulin and all their eyes got HUGE. I can imagine that none of them know what diabetes is, but I could tell HD felt like a "cool kid" in that moment.

How could I not share this one? JP still enjoys dressing up like "princess" Dorothy and HD's Cinderella dress is finally getting a bit short on him!

I'm going to finish this random post with two pictures of Ms. Gail. This first one was at her tea party. She's so stinking cute! This last one I took of her is after we arrived home from KINDERGARTEN orientation! My baby is growing up too fast!

Summer Camp is Over Already

We’re just getting started on week two of summer break and I’m still an emotional wreck. I thought I was just having a little anxiety about camp last week, but it proved to be more than that.

It wasn’t just one thing that did it but a bunch of little things I suppose, but HD was sent home from camp yesterday. The previous week he didn’t want to participate in dance so he got in trouble for not participating 100% of the time. By the end of the week, he had a crummy attitude but nothing was said to me behavior wise. He didn’t want to do his insulin shot Friday afternoon at the park, so I left work to dose him. He said he tried but it hurt and didn’t want to try again. Totally don’t blame him. But he was in trouble because he didn’t want to do it, which led him to leave his medical stuff out, which also got him in trouble. I don’t know if they forgot he is a child still, and NEEDS HELP. He’s not the most organized kid in the world. When they said can’t help him with his stuff, they clearly meant it.

Come Monday morning for the start of week two, I dropped him off at camp and they assured me everything was good to go medically. I received a call at lunch to help his leader correctly dose him as he had been running a bit high. (He was also running high last week, but I felt okay about it because I didn’t know how active he was going to be.) An hour later, the camp director calls to tell me he needs picked up because he’s not listening and is hiding from his camp leader when she says it’s time to get his blood sugar checked. I picked him up shortly there after and broke down crying as we were leaving. I believe I said something along the lines of, “I signed him up for camp  so I would know he was safe and having fun. And now I have to take him to an empty home and hope that he doesn’t have a low while I’m gone because the last thing I want to do is come home to a dead child.” I might have been being a little dramatic, but I feel like I’m in a constant state of worry and it sucks.

I later received a long email from the director stating allll the reasons why he had to leave and that he couldn’t come back until a behavior plan was in place, most which happened the week before. I also needed to go over his diabetes care with them again because I was telling them things that were different than in his doctor notes. I don’t know what things though?  She gave me the email and phone number of the person who is in charge of behavior plans. I sent an email and then called to check in later this morning to find out the status on camp, since both Perry and I had work today. Turns out the lady is ON VACATION this week. Freaking awesome. I was not impressed when I found that out later in the afternoon. They could tell I didn’t need to be messed with anymore and thankfully refunded my money for both the kids for the rest of the week.

But the whole thing is frustrating for me. We’re still new to diabetes. I don’t know everything there is to know about it yet, so I don’t expect HD to know either. He’s taken it upon himself to try to understand how to read nutrition labels and I’m so so proud of him for that. From the time we were released from the hospital, we have only had a handful of blood sugar readings above his range of 150, let alone above 200, which is when we give him extra insulin to bring it back down. I feel good knowing that he’s in range a lot. But because of that, we haven’t really experienced what having high blood sugar does to him behaviorally. All last week and yesterday he had high numbers, so I can’t help but to think his crummy attitude and his high numbers were related. At the same time, it’s hard to figure out what is sensory vs what is high blood sugar.

The whole thing is frustrating and overwhelming. I’m emotionally drained. I looked it and felt it today. I needed a hug from someone. I needed someone to tell me everything was going to be okay. This journey is really isolating. Thankfully I don’t have to work for the rest of the week. I’m looking forward to going to the beach this weekend. I need a little rest and relaxation.

Off to Summer Camp

It's the first day of summer for us now that the kids are "officially" done with school. Don't get me started on why their last day was on a Monday... Freaking snow days around here! None the less, it's summer and summer equals stress for me. Every year.

With me working again, I have Ms. Gail going to an in-home daycare, which she loves. I've spent most of the spring trying to decide what I'm going to do with HD and JP. I'm not crazy about having them gone for a good chunk of the summer, we didn't have any other feasible option unless we could shell out $400 a week for camp... They are excited about spending the summer with Grandma, Nanny, and Papa. There are a few weeks, however, that they get to hang out with mom. This week and next week are two of those weeks.

That being said, the boys have two weeks of summer camp, and their first one started today. Aside from Vacation Bible School, they haven't been to any kind of day long camp before and had no idea what to expect. I had no idea what to expect. I've been anxious just thinking about sending HD to camp with all of the sensory issues we've had with him, and now to add diabetes it. Hmph.

I've been preparing for this day for a few months now. I emailed to let the camp director know he's diabetic and received a response which said it wasn't a problem for him to come because they *usually* have nurses available. Imagine my surprise when I check in with them a couple weeks before hand and find out there isn't a nurse available to be at camp. It's a heart-sinking feeling. Just when I'm feeling good about everything, I get another curve ball.

I scrambled around getting all his gear together last night, but didn't have enough energy to get lunches packed. I was sick to my stomach all morning with anxiety but I managed get to him and JP to camp on time without any huge problems. I need to practice my "this is how to care for my child" spiel. I had several handouts to give to the camp leader that was a brief overview of what to do when he's low and what it looks like, and what to do when he's high and what that looks like. Then there's the explaining of how exercise can affect his levels as well, and how to prepare and monitor him during activities like swimming and just general running around play. There's a lot to explain and I just felt so unprepared when rattling things off.

Before I left, I gave both the boys a hug and wished them a fun day. JP looked at me and point blank said, "What if he dies?" I quickly said, "He's not going to die - you're going to help keep an eye on him." Then I left and cried the entire way home. I was managing just fine until then. My mind started jumping from scenario to scenario - what if he went low while he was swimming and drown? What if he missed feeling a low while he was playing, and collapsed on the field and no one knew what to do? I had tears rolling down my face all morning. I even made time for a little a work on the computers when I got to work until I could get myself together.

I kept my phone on me should the camp leader need to reach me. She called several times. She first called at 10:30 because when they checked his blood sugars after playing all morning, he was over 300. HD dove into his snacks that were supposed to be saved for this afternoon at the pool... I received a few calls at lunch time. And then my heart sank again when she called that afternoon while they were at the pool because his METER WASN'T WORKING. In the time we were speaking on the phone, he managed to go through 15 stinkin' test strips trying to get it to work. THIS IS WHY I HAVE ANXIETY.

He stopped my heart again when I went to pick him up and he wasn't playing in the gym or on the playground. I'm sure I had panic written all over my face. He was just hula-hooping in the second gym... My heart.

Perry has been having to work the closing shift at work this month so I don't see a lot him. I was so happy to hear he was working a normal 9-5 today because I needed a hug and to just relax. We corrected his high at dinner, gave him is bedtime insulin and just as bedtime comes around, he's low. While at the store last week, I bought a tube of glucose tabs for him to try, so he tried them out for his low and we sent him to bed. Perry went in to check on him 20 minutes or so later, and his meter now read HI 600+ and now I'm panicking thinking I gave him too many tabs. Fortunately, it was a false high because *someone* didn't wash his hands before testing... Phew.

I am happy to report that despite his hesitation to go to camp, HD had a lot of fun and is excited to go back tomorrow. JP however was pretty disappointed his brother wasn't in any of his groups. He wasn't happy when I said he had to go back a few more times this week...

Today was a hard day emotionally. I never know when the reality of his life-threatening disease is going to hit me. It comes in waves. Some days, like today, it hits me like a hurricane, other days it's just a blip on the radar. But it sucks regardless. Diabetes sucks.

Happy Birthday Sweet Girl!

You know who had a birthday last month and I completely missed sharing about it? Miss Gail! I *cannot* believe our little princess is 5 years old! I tried to convince her to stay 4 for just a little bit longer, but she insisted on having a birthday anyway.

For the last two birthdays she's wanted a Minnie Mouse cake, but changed her mind at the last minute. From Minnie to Cinderella and from Minnie to cats. This year it actually stuck though! (Frozen and Moana were tempting her a lot!) Her birthday seems to just sneak up on me every year. We count down to it, but I'm still not ready for all the planning birthday celebrations entail. 

We did have a little party for her with her family the day before. Cousin Casey rode over on a special trip with Nanny. Robin and her boyfriend, Marshall, also made an appearance at the party. I spent the morning putting the finishing touches on the cake while the kids played.

Some time during the morning, my mom took the kids to the store and Casey came back with a wind-up boat to play with. The bowl he found wasn't big enough for the boat to float around in, so I filled up the sink for him. Before I know it, both him and Ms. Gail are running off to change into their bathing suits and then they hopped into the sink as I pretended to not be watching. You can only do this at Aunt Sadie's house! They were so sweet to watch! I couldn't stay no!

Ms. Gail love love loved her cake. It's not my favorite, but if the birthday girl loves it, then that's all that matters.

I seriously can't get enough of these two! Nanny had gotten Ms. Gail a "phone" which had lip gloss in it that resembled apps. I can't tell you how many fingers she painted with lip gloss!

She also could not wait to try on her pink hair! She thought it was the best thing *ever*!

 

Ms. Gail had to share her birthday with me this year as Mother's Day landed on her special day. Because I knew how much she enjoyed bike rides, I opted to have us check out a trail that runs through town. It did not disappoint, though Ms. Gail found herself having to walk up several hills. I think we biked around 3 miles round trip.

Conveniently enough there was a gas station right off the trail so dad suggested we "go check it out." Ice cream all around! The perfect incentive to go just a little bit further.

Because we didn't get to roast hot dogs at her party, like requested, we gathered around for a roast that evening. Pretty sure roasting hot dogs is one of the kids' most favorite thing to do.

S'mores are just an added bonus :) 

It's Been One Long, Emotional Week at Home

It's been a solid week since HD was diagnosed with an incurable, potentially fatal disease. I don't think the reality of that has sunk in yet though. I'm literally acting as his pancreas. 

Honestly though, I feel like the mother of a newborn. I'm exhausted from waking up at 2:00am every morning to check his blood sugar levels. He had a low the other night, in which case I had to wake him up to eat some fruit snacks. But then I was awake at 2:30am panicking about him. Is he going to be okay? Is he going to dip lower before breakfast? How do you go back to sleep after that? How do you shut the worry off at night? All parents worry about their kids but my worry has skyrocketed in the last week. 

I feel overcome with worry throughout the day too. It's similar to the first day you take your child to daycare or have a babysitter over, leaving them in someone else's care. Newborns can't really get into trouble - they eat, sleep, and poop. But my 9 year old, he has a fully functioning brain that tells him he's hungry. Up until last week, when he was hungry, he could just go grab a snack, no big deal. But now it's terrifying to know he can eat when he's hungry. When he's at home with me, I feel like I can keep him safe, but when he's at school, I'm not there to be his food monitor. We've set up snack bins in the pantry, and in the fridge, with labels on everything. Snacks in this bin and this bin you can eat freely when you're hungry without having to get an extra dose. Snacks in these two bins, you can *only have one* between meals. It's helpful though it's not fool-proof, after-all, I'm working with a boy who often has trouble controlling his impulses.

We took him to school Monday after lunch because he was so excited to show his teacher and friends his wristband from the hospital and tell them all about his weekend. I took him into school Tuesday morning, with the assumption that his doctors had sent his medical orders over. They hadn't. He wasn't supposed to be at school without them, so after reaching voicemail after voicemail, I finally left a message for someone. It was frustrating having a list of phone numbers to call, but not being able to reach a person at 9:00am. I returned to his school Tuesday at lunch to give him his insulin and to get a few more things sorted out with the school nurse. 

By Wednesday morning, HD was feeling confident enough to GIVE HIMSELF his own insulin shot! Huge relief! The school nurse, for whatever reason, can't give him his insulin shot at school. I'm not understanding the reasoning. Only he himself, myself, Perry or a "parent designated adult" can give him his shots. I'm lost as to how to figure out who to designate as that person. I'm in an area where I'm still very alone and haven't been able to get a hold of the right person when calling the ADA. Luckily there are two other kids at school who also have T1D so the process of eating and counting and dosing are not new to them. 

He received his diabetes bear in the mail Wednesday afternoon, along with a bunch of handouts and books about diabetes. Along with his bear he received a practice needle of glucagon, his medicine we give him if he has really low blood sugar and is unresponsive. He demonstrated to Ms. Gail how it works, though JP found it all to be very boring, 

We were running low on test strips by Wednesday evening. I was not prepared for how much they were going to cost. The doctor still hadn't sorted things out with our insurance company so in the meantime, we were in limbo, and ended up needing to buy enough to get us through until our insurance was squared away. Unless you have a prescription for them, they are $80 for 50 strips. In a typical day, we'll use between 5 and 7. Yeah.... it'll last us about a week. I was able to *finally* pick up more insulin from the pharmacy last night. Ask me how annoyed I was about this... We were using the pharmacy at Safeway because that is typically where we shop, but our insurance carrier is requiring us to use a CVS pharmacy, so I told them we'd us the Albertson's near our house. Imagine my surprise when they sent it to the CVS pharmacy 25 minutes from my house, located in a freaking Target store. You know what that means?! A lot of impulse buys because, well, it's Target and I love Target. At least it's near-ish to my work, but still very frustrating for me. 

Once I had our insurance debacle somewhat figured out Wednesday evening, Ms. Gail and I took him on a hunt to find reading glasses. He mentioned the other day that reading was getting hard because the words were getting fuzzy. Common symptom. My mom directed us to the dollar store, since you know, they're only a dollar. He found an orange pair he liked, though the pickings were slim. I later found him some brown ones that look way cute on him at Ace Hardware. Who knew they'd have reading glasses for $4?!

I'm also struggling with how to calculate the serving size for the food he eats. This morning, I made buttermilk pancakes because Ms. Gail came bouncing into my room saying that's what everyone wanted for breakfast. She knew this because she told her brothers that's what they wanted. I took the recipe at hand and put it into a nutrition calculator to see how many carbs were in the recipe. We dosed him after breakfast because we didn't know how many pancakes he'd eat. He ate 16. The original recipe said it served 4. I'm living in one big word problem right now. Add this and this and divide by this but if x is too high, subtract this and add one for each of these and add it to the first  sum. Give him too much insulin and he'll go low, give him too little and he'll go high. 

I finally broke down crying Thursday night. The list of things needed to be done kept growing and I just needed help but I didn't know what kind of help. I needed to go grocery shopping, but first I needed to meal plan, but working until 4 or 5 every day has made that difficult. I was fortunate to find a box of mac n cheese in the pantry, but remembered as we sat down to eat that Ms. Gail had gymnastics that night. When we came home I found HD had homework and he *refused* to do. Writng is such a struggle for him. It would have taken 5 minutes, but we fought about it for over and hour and a half. The house needed tidying. HD's pile of supplies kept growing bigger and I needed to find a new place for it all. Perry has been working extra because his store is under staffed. By the time he arrived home, he's tired, I'm exhausted, and just overwhelmed with everything. The tears started rolling by bedtime. Uncontrollable sobbing in the corner of the kitchen. 

I just want to take this away from him. I know he'll be able to live a normal life but it still doesn't make it easier to digest. 

This is Fine...

I have anxiety. The phrase “this is fine” has been a running joke for the women in my family because of the relate-able humor we all have when it comes to anxiety. When talking about uncomfortable situations, it tends to make us feel better when we say, “This is fine” after something that seems so regular to most but very uncomfortable to the rest of us.

Here’s a little humorous example, though it wasn’t humorous at the time. I agreed to help out at a store in downtown Portland. I’ve been bouncing from store to store and this one happened to be one I had previously been to. There is a parking lot in the back but when I arrived it was full. Just going downtown gives me anxiety having to navigate through traffic on unfamiliar roads so to have the lot full tipped me off, but this is fine. This is fine. I’ll just find the parking garage. But now there are one ways to navigate and now I’m super far from the store and in the middle of downtown where I can’t just stop and re-plug in my coordinates. But this is fine. Finally I find the freaking parking garage and park but now I’m not seeing where to go to get out. I’m the basement of a parking garage super flustered and I ended up confessing to another women how I’m completely lost, flustered, and now late for work. And the phrase I’m thinking while I’m stuck in a parking garage? This is fine. The entire day at work, I’m put in these scenarios where I’m needed to complete certain tasks that haven’t been taught to me yet and I’m uttering the phrase “This is fine” just to make it through the day. (The latter is more stressful than anything.)

It’s a little humorous I was lost in a parking garage, right? I’m sure a sane person would have been fine. But me? No. I have found I don’t enjoy exploring or navigating new places on my own. I prefer to have a second person with me to ease my mind about finding parking, finding the building, finding the entrance, etc. I went out on a "date" with my husband the other weekend, when it was actually more of a me-tag-along night out with a bunch of his co-workers. I did survive. But I had to find parking on my own, in dark, which I HATE. I ended up sitting in the car for several minutes before I was able to convince myself to get out and go find him. In a crowd of people, which I hate. Guess who walked right past the entrance to the bar? This girl. But you know what? This is fine. I eventually found him and he then tried to make me go to the bar to order something. ON MY OWN. Nope nope nope. I took his drink and called it good.

I tell you these stories because you know what I have to do now? Navigate an entirely new world. Appointments and new people. Lots of new people. And calling people. I'm so introverted it hurts. In the past 24 hours I have had to push my anxiety aside, repeating "This is fine" over and over.

We left the hospital yesterday afternoon, as soon as we were done with lunch. On our way home, HD and I stopped at the pharmacy to pick up the prescriptions the doctor sent over, but only one was ready. so we went home and took a nap. Come dinner time, we prepare his meal and correctly count how many carbs he'll be consuming and do the math to see how many units of insulin he needs. I go to shoot him up only to discover the nurse sent us home WITH THE WRONG NEEDLES. We're digging through our binder on how to use these ones because they weren't the ones we practiced with. I'm almost in tears as now scenarios are flashing through my mind of us having to back to the hospital to get more, but then I remember something about picking needles up at the pharmacy so now I'm panicking about it being closed early because it's Sunday. They were open. But now I'm worried they prescribed the wrong ones. So much going through my mind and I'm trying really hard to not just break down and start crying. They had the right ones, and the rest of the night went smoothly.

Now Robin is home and she's thinking he can't go to school until the school is ready for him, and now I'm worried about work. I was able to take him to school today though. I waited until he had lunch at home along with his insulin shot before taking him. He was really excited to tell his teacher and friends about his hospital stay though when he arrived at school, he was looked a little timid. We first met with the nurse to just reiterate that yes, he does have diabetes. Yes, the doctor is sending his orders over. He's got his snacks ready in his backpack and he knows what to do with them. (But I hope he remembers!) I labeled everything. In detail. He's got his blood sugar monitor. He won't let others prick him. He likes to do that himself.

This is fine. Everything is fine. He is going to be fine. It's literally three hours. Perry is at home if he needs something. Everything is fine. I showed him his snacks he was free to eat at school and wrote directions on a bag of two other snacks, should he feel like his blood sugar is low, even though it was pretty high when he arrived at school. Imagine my surprise when I call home at 3:30 to see how school went and I hear Perry say he ate ALL of his snacks. Apparently he was hungry. Gahh!! What?!? His levels were fine when he got home. Everything was fine.

I'm going to be fine guys. This is going to be fine.